healing gracie

Dating is hard for me...really hard. I like it, and then I hate it. And then I can't seem to make up my mind about it.

I went on a date recently...a blind date. Gasp! I had sworn blind dates away a couple years ago because of quite a few bad experiences. And it seemed the dates got worse the more blind dates I went on. Yeah, I've got some interesting stories there.

Anyhoo, so I went out on this date. I was excited. I was nervous. I kept questioning my decision to have agreed to this date in the first place. And then the time came. My date showed up and we did dinner and a movie. And I had a great time! I was able to be myself (at least I think that was myself). I actually was able to carry out a conversation with him...though there were some awkward moments. We laughed, joked, talked about different things in our lives, asked questions. I guess your usual "first date talk."

Overall, I had a good time. I felt comfortable, for the most part. And he seems like a nice guy.

Enter curve ball.

I can't seem to figure out why I have such mixed up feelings about going out with him again. I can't tell if it's intuition or what that's telling me I shouldn't, or if it's fear. And add into the scene my insecurities with guys and relationships, and you get one big complicated and confusing mess. It looks like I have something else to keep my mind preoccupied for the next little while.

I will keep you all posted...maybe...